I like pens.

I like pens. But only the good ones. I like the ones in colors other than the regular blue, black and red, but I do like blue pens. I don't like black pens and I don't like red pens. Black pens are boring and red pens make me feel like I did something wrong. I like pens that are good. I hate bad pens. I like pens that feel heavy in my hand, because they have substance to them and are not wimpy. And I like the ones that write smoothly... that have free flowing ink but not felt-tip because too much ink comes out of those at once. Those are for people that write fast and never stop with their pen on the page to think for a second. Economy pens stink because sometimes the ink doesn't come out the same while you're writing so some of your writing looks faded while some looks darker. A good pen is consistent. I need consistency in a pen. A pen needs to be reliable because when you're writing by hand it's either because it's completely necessary or because you enjoy it. If your pen stops working during either of those times it is highly annoying. Eraseable pens are an oxymoron and should not exist. The entire point of writing in pen is to make it permanent and if we did not intend for it to be permanent we'd write in pencil or perhaps even colored pencil but certainly not pen. There is a sense of permanency with a pen that I like. It forces you to make a decision and stick with it. That is unless you're a scribbler, which I am not. I do not like to write something and then have to scribble it out because that's messy. So, therefore, if I think I'm going to be writing something I'm just not sure about then I write it in pencil. But pencils are really for indecisive people or people that are unsure of their work. With a pen, you are forced to be committed to what you've decided when you write it down. Of course I do like the feel of writing with a good pencil every now and again because it has a smooth and supple feel that pens sometimes do not. But this of course only applies to mechanical pencils and not the wooden kind. I don't like wooden pencils anyway because you have to sharpen them and no one should have to put up with that kind of sidetrack just to write something down.
You never know when a pen is going to be good. Sometimes you run across a regular ball-point pen that turns out to be the best thing you ever wrote with and then sometimes you get a nice pen that sucks. You can never tell just by looking at it. You always have to try it out to be sure. And you never ever take someone else's word for a good pen because they may like something in a pen that you do not and therefore you could be displeased with your pen purchase or theft. Pen theivery is all too prevelant in our world today.

At no time did this discourse ever become a metaphor for something other than pens.